Stop the Comparison

Sometimes I accomplish great things, yet it feels like it is not enough. It feels like there is something more I could have done no matter how hard I work. I could have put more time into something, more thought into it, or gone beyond what was expected of me. My thoughts were filled with could have or should have, and I realized that those thoughts are rooted in comparing myself to others or even my past self. We all hear that we shouldn’t compare ourselves to others, but that is easier said than done. It is challenging to do something without looking at others and comparing. “She is a better writer than I will ever be.” “Her hair is much nicer than mine.” It comes to us so easily, but we know it is wrong. I constantly hear that comparison is the thief of joy and things along the line, which is so true. So how do we stop something that comes to us so easily?

The biggest thing that has helped me is to acknowledge the other's talents, skills or whatever I may compare to myself without bringing myself down. Instead of thinking she is a better writer, simply change it to she is a great writer, what can I learn from her. She has great hair, but so do I. The thing about comparing is that by doing so we are putting ourselves down, which isn’t good for our confidence.

I don't stop and think about my accomplishments, but I do stop and think about “my failures” when comparing myself to others. One of the first steps to confidence is to stop those thoughts and start acknowledging our talent, skills, and beauty.